How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss? - Car Audio | DiyMobileAudio.com | Car Stereo Forum

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Old 5 Days Ago   #1
 
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Default How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

Without getting into too much detail (cause I can go on and on), but I have come up with a plan a couple months ago and always looking for advice on how to cope in my situation.

Here's the rundown.

1) Boss has a temper of an 8 year old and has serious issues. Could really benefit from anger management courses.
2) Has no control over his emotions what so ever. Lashes out like an immature child quite often.
3) Never takes accountability for their own actions and mistakes.
4) Always thinks he is right
5) Has the worst organizational skills of any person that I've ever met in my 36 year life. No sense of time management what so ever.
6) Always makes excuses
7) Talks to you (and only you) with total disrespect and arrogance, in an extremely condescending tone of voice. Is nice when he wants to be, but it's not sincere, it's fake as hell. He just puts on an act.
8) Treats your much differently than the rest of the staff
9) Always has to be reminded, babysat and hounded on.
10) Doesn't like questions being asked to him by you and only you.
11) Is a severe procrastinator
12) Is a pervert, he likes to check out underage girls. He always chooses this one restaurant so he can check out the 16 year old waitresses in mini-skirts.
13) Is phoney as hell, puts on a temporary happy face when needed, not sincere, can't be taken seriously. Keep your emotions at level, never get too high or low with him.
14) At first I thought there was a possible bi-polar, split personality, but now l've seen that he's not bi-polar, he's just a serious a-hole, douchebag, prick, he's all of them.
15) Thinks he is Mr. Perfect
16) Jumps to conclusions, always blames you for everything!
17) Is not a good listener, he doesn't care what you have to say when you are trying to explain something, he will intentionally cut you off every single time with his retarded comments.
18) Has a massive ego
19) Fake as hell! Everything about his personality is fake as hell.
20) Never, ever...ever apologizes.
21) Has favorites in the company, treats his favourites with much more respect.
22) Is downright mean, he's simply a bully.
23) Looking at his face makes you wanna puke.
24) Even being around him once a week is more than enough for you. Makes you wanna gag.
25) Often blows fuses at you, with or without others around.
26) Will often make a mockery of you and embarrass you when in group situations.

That's all that I can think of, I will add if I am forgetting any.

Here is a brief summary on my gameplan that I came up with a couple months ago.

- Like the saying goes, "Fake it till you make it", in my case, fake it for as long as I need to. In this case, when I find a new employer.

- Keep my mouth shut. Don't say a single thing to him unless I absolutely need to and when I do have to, keep it to as little words as possible. Just go about my job and keep my mouth shut. Use others as resources if needed, take more steps on my own if needed.

- When in group situations, use the company and presence of other staff as a positive distraction, a communicative piece for me to be myself, show my personality and socialize with

- Keep my emotions at an even keel, don't get high with him and don't get low with him. That way when he does lash out on me, I don't get rattled, I just shake it off and laugh it off because I already know the guy is a total joke. I've found this to really help me, the more I see him as a pathetic joke in life, the more I am able to minimize me getting rattled by his blatant insults and him ridiculing me in public.

- Though while I keep my mouth shut with him, I don't show any signs of my pure dislike for him, so I fill in dead space with random talk. Talk about weather, sports, general BS, and "faking it" that I even remotely care to be chatting with him. I am very good at this. Does it feel natural? Not at all, but you have to do what you have to do at times.

I've always been told in my 36 yr old life that one of my greatest and most valuable qualities is my self composure, which is 100% true. Unlike others, I simply do not and refuse to show my emotions in work situations. I can take a lot of heat, I may get rattled, but I never lash out on anyone. He's not even worth the stress in lashing out on.

Let's just say that after he flat out blatantly accused me of stealing stuff from his fridge 2 months ago, I've never looked at him in the same light and will never again. I have zero respect for him.

Last edited by Mayosandwich; 5 Days Ago at 01:11 PM..
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Old 5 Days Ago   #2
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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

Umm.... I would be looking for another job. That's just me, though.


Seriously, do you ever see this getting better? If not, you are simply signing on for misery.

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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

If you have a list of items two dozen long why you dislike your boss then the correct method of coping is to search out another place of employment, like mentioned above.
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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

Dont put another minutes thought into this...move on. You have two options: Look for another job or become your own boss. The later is much better... I am 20 years now without having a boss.

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Old 5 Days Ago   #5
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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

I just went through something similar. Lasted 8 days at the job! Speak your mind to him, even though it more than likely won't change his ways in the future, and walk straight out the door with your dignity!
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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

sounds identical to my old boss. i couldnt take it anymore. one of the main reasons i work for myself now

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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

Quote:
Originally Posted by rayray881 View Post
I just went through something similar. Lasted 8 days at the job! Speak your mind to him, even though it more than likely won't change his ways in the future, and walk straight out the door with your dignity!
This. Don't fuck around and tell him what you think and be honest. if he doesn't like it, f that. Move on. If he fires you, go to the labor office and report him. I had to do it, didn't see it coming..

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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

Let him know you're not gonna take his crap. I did that to a boss one time and for the next several years before he transferred to a different location I never had another problem out of him. Actually, I think he was trying to get me to stand up for myself. My boss at the time didn't have near as long of a list of things I hated about him. He was an alcoholic and womanizer but rarely let that interfere with his job.

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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

Here's the thing. There is a reason why I am toughing it out until I find something else.

1) The economy here in Alberta is still in an extreme down turn with an over 10% unemployment rate. There are just no jobs out there, period. So many people have fleed to other countries and cities just for work.

I am using this job to pay the bills, that's it!

2) This guy isn't even worth an ounce of stress to tell him how I really feel. He is an absolute joke and no matter what he does or says to me to try to ridicule me, I must keep proving that I am stronger than him. I may bend, but I won't break.

3) I quit, and because I am hired as a contractor, I don't have EI to fall back on.

4) This is a work from home position with the occasion of group meetings and gatherings outside. Sometimes I see my boss once every 3 weeks, other times, twice in a week. Obviously the less I have to see this schmuck the better. Trust me, I would have quit by now if this wasn't a work from home position and I had to be around this idiot for 5 days a week.

So because it's work from home it allows and gives me amazing freedom. I can't take this for granted.

I know as crazy as this sounds, my sister believes I should tough it out. She says that this is how you become a better worker, by learning how to adapt to different personality types in the workplace. It's an extremely valuable quality to have as a worker.

She says that I've been known to just give up and quit on former jobs because of my inability to handle conflict and I need to suck it up and tough it out because every job isn't going to be red roses and I need to be able to handle working for really tough employers.

Last edited by Mayosandwich; 5 Days Ago at 05:42 PM..
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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mayosandwich View Post
2) This guy isn't even worth an ounce of stress to tell him how I really feel.
yet here you are, complaining about him during your time off work...

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Old 5 Days Ago   #11
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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

Holy Shit dude..................move on

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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

Have you tried taking him aside and asking what the problem is?
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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mayosandwich View Post
...This is a work from home position with the occasion of group meetings and gatherings outside. Sometimes I see my boss once every 3 weeks, other times, twice in a week.
Keep this job until you can find another since you don't have to see him often. I sometimes work with one of the highest order twatwaffles on the planet, but since it's only sometimes I keep working there. If I had to work with that douchenozzle every day, I'd have already quit. Most of us work with people we don't like. All things considered, I'd find some way to cope until you can transition to something else.
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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

Quote:
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Have you tried taking him aside and asking what the problem is?
Not a terrible idea. I had to do this with a co-worker not too terribly long ago and we hugged it out - get along great now.
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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

I`d love to hear what your boss think about you, I bet he has a list just as long.
It seems you guys just incompatible in workplace.

It seems like most people don't care to actually understand reality.
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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

i drive truck for a living doing heavy construction hauling, my boss is such a micro manager that we have to call in every time we leave one job site to go to another, even though they know where we are going because they are the ones who dispatched up, they also have satellite tracking so they know when we are moving and stopped and where we are at all times of the day, than he belittles us for being truck drivers ,he got his 4 years at usc paid for by his parents so he likes to rub his wealth in our faces, its sometimes hard to deal with but for most of the time i just let it pass and do my job, got no time to be allowing shit to get to me anymore
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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mayosandwich View Post
Without getting into too much detail (cause I can go on and on), but I have come up with a plan a couple months ago and always looking for advice on how to cope in my situation.

Here's the rundown.

1) Boss has a temper of an 8 year old and has serious issues. Could really benefit from anger management courses.
2) Has no control over his emotions what so ever. Lashes out like an immature child quite often.
3) Never takes accountability for their own actions and mistakes.
4) Always thinks he is right
5) Has the worst organizational skills of any person that I've ever met in my 36 year life. No sense of time management what so ever.
6) Always makes excuses
7) Talks to you (and only you) with total disrespect and arrogance, in an extremely condescending tone of voice. Is nice when he wants to be, but it's not sincere, it's fake as hell. He just puts on an act.
8) Treats your much differently than the rest of the staff
9) Always has to be reminded, babysat and hounded on.
10) Doesn't like questions being asked to him by you and only you.
11) Is a severe procrastinator
12) Is a pervert, he likes to check out underage girls. He always chooses this one restaurant so he can check out the 16 year old waitresses in mini-skirts.
13) Is phoney as hell, puts on a temporary happy face when needed, not sincere, can't be taken seriously. Keep your emotions at level, never get too high or low with him.
14) At first I thought there was a possible bi-polar, split personality, but now l've seen that he's not bi-polar, he's just a serious a-hole, douchebag, prick, he's all of them.
15) Thinks he is Mr. Perfect
16) Jumps to conclusions, always blames you for everything!
17) Is not a good listener, he doesn't care what you have to say when you are trying to explain something, he will intentionally cut you off every single time with his retarded comments.
18) Has a massive ego
19) Fake as hell! Everything about his personality is fake as hell.
20) Never, ever...ever apologizes.
21) Has favorites in the company, treats his favourites with much more respect.
22) Is downright mean, he's simply a bully.
23) Looking at his face makes you wanna puke.
24) Even being around him once a week is more than enough for you. Makes you wanna gag.
25) Often blows fuses at you, with or without others around.
26) Will often make a mockery of you and embarrass you when in group situations.
Do you work for Trump?

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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

its easy for me. I look at him in the mirror every day!

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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

Step 1: Is your sister right? have you looked at your behaviors and performance? You mentioned he acts this way only with you. Are you meeting all of the responsibilities of your half of the relationship? Are you allowing him to get under your skin?

Step 2: Talk one on one in a non-confrontational way. Let the boss know that you value the job and want to perform it well, then ask how can I perform it better. That alone may improve their opinion of you or enable them to reveal what needs to be fixed.

Option 2: Find a new boss to work for. It is a crap shoot finding a good boss. The next one might even be worse. A work from home job that only sees the boss once every 3 weeks might not be worth replacing. You communicating with the boss should happen either way
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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

Two key things to consider in mapping out your plan:
1) Would you LOVE this job/company if he wasn't there
2) Is he a temporary distraction or permanent roadblock (to career advancement)?

If answer to (1) is NO then plan a way out ASAP and don't look back
If answer to (2) is "permanent roadblock" then same plan

If you really want to stick it out at this company, then ignore boss & focus on your job performance and relationship to everyone else. These will speak for themselves.

Caution: your list makes it sound like he only has a problem with *you*. How do others feel about him? If this is personal and *only* between him and you it will be difficult to solve and you should move on IMO.

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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

good Lord, you are acting like a teenager, not a 36yo adult. if you have issues with him have a one on one and voice your concerns, i am a business owner and being one is not a popularity contest, its doing whats right to move forward and grow. theres 2 sides to every story and i am willing to bet you have brought some of this if not all of this upon yourself but you cant see your own faults so you blame others. than again you will never know if you don't have the balls to sit down with him/her and have a cordial meeting

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Old 4 Days Ago   #22
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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

Oh boy, that list!
Maybe it has to do with the way being raised or educated.
Maybe he grew up without a dad, no brothers and sisters either.


I would try to get closer to him, go out with him and talk to him on a personal level, if you have a chance.

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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

He is your boss. You don't have to be friends.

He is your boss. He does not care about your observations, about him or anything else. He does not care if you think he is childish, stupid, a procrastinator, fake, or anything else. If he wanted to know your opinion, or cared about your opinion, he would ask. Being a boss, either a good one or a bad one, is not about people pleasing, nor is it a popularity contest. Bosses don't care. Why? Because they are the boss. Good bosses do some of these things, but not because they have to - but doing them is part of the reason they are good bosses. You do not see him as a good boss; don't expect him to be one or to do the things a good boss does.

He is your boss. I have never had a boss that asked me how I wanted him to communicate with him. Your boss is probably the same. Adjust to his communication style, or leave.

He is your boss. As long as he is not abusive, or does not do things that trigger employment-related concerns, you have no recourse - other than to leave.

He "might not be your boss" - If you are a contractor. Then find another company to work for.

It seems clear you have no respect for him (I am not suggesting you should or that his behavior warrants respect). Decide how log you are willing to work for someone you don't respect. That is a choice.

Set a schedule to find a new job, then go about doing the things necessary to systematically find one.

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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

Pretend you joined the NRA and post pictures of you holding machine guns and/or shooting anti-tank riffles on facebook.
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Default Re: How do you cope in working for an a-hole of a boss?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Porsche View Post
good Lord, you are acting like a teenager, not a 36yo adult. if you have issues with him have a one on one and voice your concerns, i am a business owner and being one is not a popularity contest, its doing whats right to move forward and grow. theres 2 sides to every story and i am willing to bet you have brought some of this if not all of this upon yourself but you cant see your own faults so you blame others. than again you will never know if you don't have the balls to sit down with him/her and have a cordial meeting
I have to agree somewhat... I am on total disability now and have been for the past 6 years. Prior to getting sick I was a banker. For about 10 years I worked for SunTrust Bank, a Fantastic company! I had a wonderful manager there who unfortunately got very ill and passed away. The lady who replaced him was a former peer of mine from the Business Banking Sector we had always gotten along very well, and I assumed this would continue... I thought wrong. I absolutely HATED her as a manager. I can relate to all of the nitpicky things you say about your current manager b/c I said them about her. She was THE DEVIL INCARNATE as far as I was concerned.

I left SunTrust, and went to work for First Tennessee doing the same job for essentially the same base pay with a lot less bonus money (not as good a branch location). I end up working for this woman at First Tennessee that makes the woman at SunTrust look like an angel. It was unbelievable!!! I learned a VERY, VERY important life lesson with regards to "grass is always greener syndrome". This lady at First Tennessee was demented. She was the most sociopathic individual I've ever met. I still don't know how she got a job at a bank. She lied, lied, lied, lied, lied, lied, lied, constantly!!! I don't think she EVER worked a Saturday the entire year and a half I worked for her. She'd make up some Cock-a-mai-me excuse that her dog died or something and she needed me to fill in for her. One time we caught her in a lie where she said she was supposed to be at some charity luncheon, & she wasn't there. She came running in with some fake ass crocodile tears talking about how her grandmother had passed away, and she'd been​ at the hospital. Needless to say it was ridiculous!

She NEVER came to work at all and the branch hardly ever hit it's goals not so much b/c she wasn't there, but b/c I started getting really sick. She kept telling me "oh we're going to be fine", while all the while she was blaming the bad #s on me and my lack of performance. She of course forgot to mention the fact that I had an ADA excuse.

Eventually I got too sick to work and had to go on disability. I did qualify for disability through SSI but unfortunately when I left SunTrust I forfeited all the disability benefits I had vested in that pension fund. I still have my 401k money of course, but if I had just stuck it out and stayed at SunTrust I would have another $1500 a month in disability payments to count on.

Think about what you are doing. A bird in the hand... Grass is always greener... whatever... Just think things through...

Seriously

Sent from my Nexus 5X using Tapatalk
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